Becoming a socialite can be an easy and fast way to enter the list of the rich and the famous. If you observe the behavior of a socialite, you will understand why he or she is ‘controversy’s favorite child’. SocialMettle intends to take a satirical take on the topic of how to become a socialite.
“Every woman should have four pets in her life. A mink in her closet, a jaguar in her garage, a tiger in her bed, and a jackass who pays for everything.”
– Paris Hilton
These days girls aspire to be like Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian, Nicole Richie, Nicole Polizzi, etc. They all have one thing in common. They all are so-called socialites and celebrities in their own right. A socialite attends fashionable social dos, entertains through television, travels all over the globe to shop, and is a fashion icon for many young girls today.
In older times, the wives and mistresses of noble men and royalty used to participate in a number of social activities for entertainment. Today, apart from attending fancy parties and brunches with other socialites, many of them also arrange for fundraisers for various charities. Most socialites are born in aristocratic families; however, there are a number of self-made socialites who have become popular over a period of time. A different take on the lives of young socialites can be seen in the popular television show ‘Gossip Girl’.
The sparkle of a glamorous life can be blinding to the harsh actualities of life. Hence, many youngsters try to emulate the lifestyles of socialites as it is attached to lots of wealth and free time. However, the image of socialites that we come across is far from reality. Here are a few tips you can use if you want to become a socialite.
9 Steps to Help You Climb the Social Ladder
Participate in a Reality Show
Being part of a reality show can almost overnight catapult you to stardom. It has been observed that the more you act as a ‘baddie’, the more popular you will become. Try to gain maximum mileage by behaving in an odd way, and swearing a lot on the reality show. It’s okay even if you don’t win. All that you have to do is have a sensational presence throughout. Flirt, fight, or do whatever it takes to prove that people like to watch you, and that you are popular. Such popularity will result in an instantaneous fan following. Paparazzi will start chasing your every move. Even if your pet pooch is down with cold, you will become part of the news. You will get invited to parties of the rich and famous, and will even land offers of several more reality shows.
Clothes – The Skimpier, the Better
Go through the glossy, colored pages of gossip magazines and tabloids, or watch gossip shows on television. You will understand how to wear sensational and cutesy girlie clothing to get all the attention. Either you can stick to designer outfits, or create a mis-match of your own. Remember there should always be a ‘surprise element’ about the clothes. They should either be altogether weird, skimpy, transparent, or revealing. An instance or two of a wardrobe malfunction should be thrown in for good measure. Whether it is a swimsuit or maternity wear, remember the golden rule to become a socialite, you must ‘always’ stand out from the crowd. Your fashion sense should make you a trend-setter and not a mere trend-follower.
Always Act Dumb
I know it’s difficult to act dumb, especially when you are strategically trying to hob-knob with the close-knit social circles. But then if you sound intelligent, no one is going to take you seriously as a socialite. If you are an independently-opinionated person, stop at once. You must sound oblivious to the brutal realities of life. You must always sound like a dumb, shallow, and materialistic person, whose general knowledge is limited to pages of fashion magazines. When asked about your biggest dream, you must be able to answer, ‘Getting a pink-colored villa in Hawaii’ or ‘starting a reality show on your life’. Trust me, the dumbest of views will make you the hottest celebrity.
Carry a Pooch in a Bag
Whether you go to a gym, or attend a funeral, you must always carry a socialite’s best friend – a pooch in your bag. Remember the pooch should be of a highly-coveted and expensive breed. Get designer bags to keep the pooch. Do remember to match the bag, and the accessories of the pooch with your dress every time. Give the pooch a bizarre name which will cause a stir in the media. It should initiate discussions of epic proportions on the Internet, television, and in the newspapers. Not only will it make you look stylish, but also portray you as an animal-lover. Make it a point to get snapped with the pooch all the time. If that is not enough, make a Twitter account and Facebook page for your pooch. Post bizarre photos and messages to get instant popularity.
Create Controversies to Hog the Limelight
Trust me, this is all that it boils down to. Remember the wise old saying, ‘Out of sight is out of mind’. Well, to be a socialite this is exactly what you should avoid. And you can do it by creating constant controversies. Whether you got booked under DUI or drug laws, got into a cat fight with another socialite, wore a dress that was almost invisible, had an affair with a married millionaire, made a sex tape which got stolen and then released on the Internet, etc., make it a point that you stay in news. Exchange heated words or pass negative comments about others on Twitter, make enemies, do whatever it takes to be in news. Pose for the paparazzi and enjoy the attention. Make it a point that even if you step in a supermarket to buy toilet paper, it should be on the front pages of the tabloids.
Get a Socialite Appearance
Now now, have you ever seen a popular socialite who is not fit? It is a fact that socialites with a size zero figure are popular with the masses. So all you have to do is either workout harder, eat healthy, or opt for the usual liposuction. If you think that any part of your body is so flawed that it is marring your appearance, then conduct multiple surgeries to have it corrected at once. Be it rhinoplasty, boob job, lip plumping, face-lift, or hair extensions, don’t wait for others to point it out. Make it a point that whatever beauty procedure you have undergone is made public, but you must deny it outrightly at first. This will create an air of mystery around you and result in more publicity. Then you should go to a famous chat show and confess it to the public.
Emulate the Social Goddesses
Study magazines, tabloids, and gossip programs on television and observe the established social goddesses to understand what all is required to be done in order to become a socialite. Learn to promote yourself in every possible way. You will find that they either have a designer clothing line, a perfume, or an album in their name. Not only this, but they also bag high-end endorsements. Some of them also have a full-fledged reality show on their lives. End up at the right place at the right time. Attend and host happening parties. Network with the right people – journalists, paparazzi, celebrities, etc. Hire a PR agency to look after your publicity. They will guide you into making a story about everything in your personal life.
Exploit the Social Media
As you climb the social ladder to emerge as the newest and hottest celebrity on the circuit, people will become more and more interested to know about your personal life. Utilize your Facebook account to let people know which sizzling nightclubs or cool places you checked in at. Post your bikini-clad photos from your latest holidays on your profile, or use Instagram for sharing random pics when you get a new haircut, get a new piercing, go shopping, or even get a pedicure. If you upload photos of you and your friends getting wasted after an alcohol party, you are sure to get lots of media criticism which will result in lots of fan following. Don’t forget to tweet dumb posts on Twitter, which will make you even more popular. You may also vent out your frustration at your arch enemies by making nasty comments or start a blog about weight loss, shopping, fashion, make up tips, etc. Ensure that whatever you do, there should not be an iota of intelligence in it.
Capitalize on Your Relationships
It is important that the person you are dating carries some interesting attribute that will promote you as a celebrity. Your love interest can be a controversial singer, an old millionaire, a former convict, or a serial divorcee. Ensure that he is rich and famous, and can support you to lead an extravagant lifestyle and splash his money on expensive gifts for you. Give hints about your relationship in public but never completely accept it. Make sure that once in a while, you are spotted as arm candy with some other man. This will increase the curiosity surrounding you and your beau’s relationship status. If you are out holidaying at some exotic location, do not forget to conduct some public display of affection to fan the interest of the paparazzi. If you become pregnant, make sure you have the weirdest ever name for your baby. Don’t forget to sell the rights of the first photos of your baby to a big magazine. Even if you are having a tiff with your beau in public, it will only help to enhance your social status.
Not everyone can become a socialite. One really needs the qualities of courage, grit, and a bad memory to put the bitter experiences behind and move on in life. Always remember, the status of being a socialite comes with the double-edged sword of ‘publicity’. Once, you become a celebrity, absolutely nothing about your life remains private. At times, it will be difficult for you to handle the spotlight because the praise will come with inherent stark criticism. You will be pursued by the paparazzi no matter what you do. You will have to make a lot of changes in your personality to become a socialite and many times even compromise with your personal values. If you are okay with it, go ahead and claim your rightful spotlight. However, if you are not ready to change, it is best not to think about becoming a socialite.
