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True Meaning of Friendship

Mukta Gaikwad Oct 13, 2018
It is extremely difficult to summarize the true meaning of friendship in a few words. ... Friendship is a vast subject and the essence of it is something that we sense in various facets of life. Here is an incorporation of the heavenly beauty of this relationship in a few words.
Friendship is the purest form of relationship we share with someone. It is so because a true friendship never calculates family or social backgrounds, looks, or money. When we made friends at the age of 5 or 6 we only cared about spending time with that person, whether on playground or at class. And that was enough to make that us friends forever.
There was no judgment  in that phase of life. If you think of it, the bond of friendship built in childhood is the strongest. As one grows up, one begins to judge people, and ends up being judged in return. Simply put, "A friendship that is based on judgment is not friendship, it is just a name given to the business you share."

What Does Friendship Mean?

School is where we first begin to socialize. It's the first ever moment of life that demands us to seek beyond ourselves. Making friends at school for some kids, is a daunting task. Nonetheless each child finds a friend. As school years are the shaping years of our life, we learn lessons that probably no textbook can compete.
Most of the lessons learned are, because the friends around us. The first moments of achievements, of failure, of love, of laughter, of loss, of gain, and of change are shared with friends. This is the reason why they become an integral part of us and etch the journey of finding friendship.
The teenage years are the years where we begin to experiment. The rebel within us takes form and challenges everything that is learned so far. Many of us lose track of ourselves, we fight with the purple demons of hate and violence residing in us. At this juncture, the wisdom of friends is what comes to our rescue.
True friendship is the one which provides the searchlight over the vast ocean of troubles and tribulations. The wise counsels of friends show us the way and the path to be taken. True friendship is the one that does not give up in this phase.
An entry into the adolescent world, is more dynamic than the teenage. At this point of time in life, 'decisions' take the center-stage. As difficult as they seem, making the decisions of education or career are equally important in value and purpose.
None of us are perfect, and hence a few decisions turn out to be a big mistake. Friends help you see beyond the mistake and launch your senses on the bigger picture of life. Friendship means, growing closer in sentiment and thought.
The popular epic series 'Harry Potter', is more of emphasis on the friendship of Harry, Ron, and Hermione than the adventures. All through the book the duo, Hermione and Ron, come out unscathed, out of near-to-death situations for Harry. The series is an excellent show of their valor, determination, and undying love for each other.
The 4th book, sees Harry generously give away his prize to Fred and George, it is Fred who lost his life in saving Harry in the last book. The author, J.K. Rowling has created the magical fantasy for children. But the books have far more interesting lessons for adults too.
They are the lessons that primarily preach 'love over hate always wins the race'. However, there are a million little things that she teaches her reader, if he were to read between the lines. This unconditional love for friends is a lesson we usually forget in the maddening race of life.

Who Exactly is a Real Friend?

... The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.
- Henri J.M. Nouwen, The Road to Daybreak: A Spiritual Journey
You are really lucky if you have a person like this in your life, it's a blessing and do not mistake to take it for granted! You will find a thousand people who call you a friend, and one glace at your social media handle will affirm the same. Ask yourself, out of the hundreds of friends in your profile, is there anyone who would fit for the quote mentioned?
A friend is a person who has different roles in our lives; he is the one who spoils us, he is the one who guides us, he is the one who hurts us, and he is also the one who comforts us in despair. A real friend is the person who gives you the freedom to be yourself, and who gives you the liberty to let go of the mask that you wear for the rest of the world.
Your true friend will not judge you, he will not condemn you; on the contrary, he will believe in you, hold your hand when you ask him to leave you alone, tell you that you have done wrong, but assure you that things will be right again. A true friend is the one who will never leave you in difficult times ...
There are many facets to this relationship. Many people tend to believe that a friend can only be someone who is outside your family; if you think the same, try to look closer before widening your horizon. It goes without saying that a person who is close to you is the only one who will understand you the most.
To summarize it all, If you have a shoulder, other than your own, to take your weight; if you have a hand other than your own to wipe your tears; if you have ears other than your own, to listen to your unspoken words; then you surely have a friend, in the true sense of it.

As You Sow, So You Reap ...

How many slams in an old screen door? Depends how loud you shut it. How many slices in a bread? Depends how thin you cut it. How much good inside a day? Depends how good you live 'em. How much love inside a friend? Depends how much you give 'em.
- Shel Silverstein
The reason why most of the people fail to find a true friend, is because they forget that friendship is a two-way journey! We get easily angered when we don't receive what we expect, but have you given it a thought, that your friend also expects from you?
The problem is that when we know that there is a person who will stick to us at all times, we tend to take that person for granted. Friendship is a relationship that needs nurturing, it needs elements like love, understanding, commitment, trust, and respect. The beauty of it all is that all these things come naturally, not forcefully!
The issue is that when we get too comfortable with a person, we tend to do, or say things in a disrespectful way, which can be hurtful at times. Many a time, we don't even realize if we have been arrogant, therefore, if you wish to have a friendship as strong as it can get, never ever take the people in your life for granted.
Respect the fact that they are there for you, and they value you. Don't just start shouting at them because you are in a 'bad mood'. If you want them to value you, you need to value them!
A friend tells you what you want to hear; a best friend tells you the truth.
- Marilyn Monroe
Life indeed is a roller-coaster ride, we all have our share of ups and downs; however, not all are lucky enough to have a friend who has held your hand at all time. So, cherish the gift of friendship that God has blessed you with.
Remember that you have to earn friends by being a good friend yourself. Don't judge, don't slam your expectations. Just try to be a good friend, and you will be rewarded with the same gesture in return. Real friends are forever, but life is not, so make the most of them now, as there is much to gain than to lose!
We'll conclude with an appropriate quote:

"A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you."
― Elbert Hubbard.